Busy Busy, I've Got a New Puppy!!

Yay, it worked out!!! I've got a new puppy!!!

A day after poor Dickie died, my neighbour brought home 2 little puppies to replace her Brownie. Her parents only allowed her to keep one. So we took the other one!!! =)

The pups are mixed... the vet said maybe terrier and something else i can't remember, let alone write it. Their owner abandoned them by road the somewhere in Salak Selatan.

The puppies can't be seperated, they make too much noise. So the agreement would be, we look after them for a while and then it's their turn... Also sharing their vitamins and ear drops (infection). Yesterday and today's my turn and wahh... these puppies are give me a good workout.

They're so small they can fit into anywhere and i dun wanna lose them. Gotta follow them here n there! So tiring.

And i've got a test on Fri, stupid Financial Management so gotta study too. Then assignments would roll in... Can't blog much! =(

By the way, thanks for being concerned over E and i. We're fine by the way. =)

=)

One thing's cleared up. Feel so much better. That's why she's my bestfriend! I can tell her how i really feel and things are not messed up. =) She's the greatest!

But the other thing i'm... err... the other thing that annoys me is not cleared yet la... should i talk to the other person too??? I dunno... should i??? Ahhhhh!!!

On Blogging

There are certain things i really really wanna write about... certain things that is rather controvertial... just have to hold back.

Then there are other things. Like bitchings. I really want to complain about a some people... but i can't do that, DUHHHH. The best i can do is use an example... a totally different but still similar story to get my point across...

But u know. There's the whole situation thing. They'll surely know u couldn't possibly be going through the same situation u went through with them with someone else. What are the chances???

Blogging is, in a way, just a landmine waiting to explode... if u write the wrong thing and the wrong person sees it. You're a goner. A something i wrote 6 months ago caused HUGE mess. I do not wanna repeat that with different people. How am i supposed to know they were so sensitive???

Sucks to hold back. Urrrrgh... i have to resort to Dear Diary................

Miscommunication // Blogging is Good

Communication and miscommunication is really a problem.

I undrestood most of the tutorial today until the lecturer got to one part. Totally did not make sense to me. At all. So i raised my hand and asked... Too bad time's up for the class and i had to ask one on one after class.

So he explained the answer from the beginning... i understood the begining... so i nodded...
Continue explaining... i understand... Then when he came to one part i don't understand, i say la i dun understand.

He then repeat all the way from the beginning again. So i nodd again. Repeat whole process. Until he reached the same part i don't understand. And then start again man!

Dunno how many times he exaplain the thing i already understand. Over and over again.

Until i THOUGHT i understood... so i said "Thank u sir"...
Then on the way home, i realized No la i still dun understand lar!!!

Aiyoh... maybe i should be more specific in asking questions? Or did he misunderstand my question???? Yes, the subject itself hard...


Found a study partner who actually really PRESSURES me to study gor this subject. Sorry la, but he fits the general description of a nerd. Which makes the fact that he ACTUALLY wants to ask ME questions such a HUGE compliment.

Whether or not i'm smart is another topic. But the compliment makes me want to read up on the topic, understand it as best as i can and be able to discuss the questions. U know... to show that i AM smart.

Or at least smart enough to prove that it wasn't a mistake for him to call me to discuss!!! Haha


Damn lar!!!! I'm supposed to study for this subject but E and i just had a miscommunication tonight so i ended up chatting longer than i wanted to... just wanted to clear things up... but it isn't cleared up yet...

In a way, i dun wanna put my dirty lining in public... or however the saying goes... And of cuz! I'm not blaming u, E. I'm just saying this because i wanted to explain why i came up with miscommunication as an issue we face...

Anyway E, i'm going to tell why i wrote this. I wrote this post while arguing/sorting things out with u cuz i didn't want to cry... needed to take my mind of things... ya la, it is still a similar subject... but at least, writing this prevented me from crying... =P

But if u want me to admit, i did cry a few tears. But when i continued writing... the tears went away as i was preoccupied with writing... made me calm throughout our... talk.

Writing this helped me occupy myself as i waited for him to reply my messages... Hey, in a way, Blogging so helped-- me.

I mean, if i didn't keep my mind away from things... i would have gotten too... emotional... and i would have cried n cried and then i wouldn't be able to do the studying...

Dickie

Have had this picture as my wallpaper on my computer for so long that i forgot all about it... It's just part of the computer to me.


But seeing it today made me sad la... Dog died =( Soooo poor thing... Not very close to this dog but u know, if we took better care of him he wouldn't have had to go.

Not that old, only about 9. And the death was very sudden...

I was at Sunway Lagoon with E for the Hotlink Quicksilver Revolution thing (took d opportunity to get to play slides la). After my shower i turned on my phone and saw two messages from my mom.

"Dickie is very sick... cannot move..jerking..trembling..vet took him for treatment".

and then "Poor Dickie died on the way to the vet".

Feel like crying but didn't really cry la... Not exactly attached to this dog, but u know... it's so pitiful right? And he was cute and naughty... but really really smart.

Okay now i'm crying... never really gave him as much love as he deserved. U see, so cute! He only does that on Sundays. When my maid is having her off day and there's no one who would shoo him out of the house.

My mom always had a soft spot for him, she would allow him to act cute there in the kitchen as she cooked. He does that to get food. Aiyoh... never really appreciated him till he's gone.


----- U can stop reading here---- the rest is for me to remember him-----

Didn't even LOOK at him since 2 nights ago, when i had to chase him back when he ran out of the gate...

Thank GOD i took this picture some time ago... when did i take this picture? Wow Febuary LAST year? Wow... so long ago. And i never made the time to post it till NOW!

Feel so sad. What else does he do? Oh yeah, i trained him to sit if i hold up a bone/food. Only then i would throw it to him. And he always catches it! =( Gonna miss that. All the small little things..

And u know, other simple stuff... when i come home, he'll always be around to greet me... and smell my Kancil's tyre's for any other dog/cat's piss... Why didn't he do that yesterday? Oh yeah, cuz E drove me home...

Ahhhhh, so hard 2 write this post... keep crying and i dun want anyone to see me like this. What a hypocrite i am. Not like i was close to him...

But STILL... ='|

Aiyoh... LAZY la!!!

Aiyoh... Keep overhearing seniors tell me about internship... one of my friends who is on the same year as me has already done it too...

Aiyoh... malas la, dun want la. Need ar?

A friend invited me on a Sarawak trip at the end of the year, and i might not be able to go if i wanna do a stupid internship, do i have to???

Why must Air Asia force u to book sooo damned early? Why are all airlines like that? How am i supposed 2 know if i can go?

Any idea when all the internships start? I looked through some websites and they didn't write any dates.

Also... aiyoh... just seeing it as work makes me so aiyoh... i didn't look much, just wanted to close the browser as quickly as possible =(

I Love Sleeping

I am such a pig. Holiday, get up, go back to sleep. Get up again, go back to sleep again.

Get up, reset alarm, go back to sleep. Get up, brush my teeth, wash my face, pee. Eat. Go back to sleep.

This is bad cuz i haven't done any studying or any assignments!!

And worse... this problem has been creating another problem... E makes the effort to wake me up yet i go back to sleep... countless times.

Only got up when he was so pissed (after calling me 3 times), he hung up on me...

Help!! Why am i so lazy? Why is my bed so comfortable? Why does it have to keep on raining???????

Comments disabled! Sorry cuz if u tell me it's normal to love to sleep i might end up sleeping even more!

Unbelievable

Went jogging a few days after Valentines and i saw this Malay couple at the park. The guy was serenading her! Singing, with a guitar, on a bench facing the lake, so romantic.

That was when i passed them on my 1st round. On the second round, when i passed them, the stadium nearby was playing Negaraku on loudspeakers.

The guy actually stood up straight to respect the song!!! As if anyone else cared to do that, sorry la. Hahaha, i continued jogging (walking, actually). Even the girlfriend was relaxed in the bench.

On my third round around the lake, when i passed them they were taking a stroll. That's when i noticed. Girl is huge!

Really fat. Not fat like u and me (since everyone says they're fat). She's obese!

Yet the guy never pressured her to jog or anything!!! She was wearing a baju kurung. And they were strolling slowly. He doesn't make her exercise. In a way it's bad cuz it's unhealthy to be obese...

But still, it's so sweet to see this guy contented, happy and so loving towards her despite her BIG size. I mean... most guys out there only want hot chicks!

And this couple's not young! Maybe in their 30s??!!! Still, they go dating as if they were teenagers or something! Wowww, unbelievable, right???

From the Pages of Her Diary

Nah, don't expect anything too juicy. Of course not! =P

Although i won't mind admiting this... i never wanted E to keep his hair long. Yeah, i never ever defended him when u guys say it's ugly to him but, I LIKE IT!!! Ahahahah.

And i like the fact that he doesn't follow my every word! We love each other but we're not... joint in the hip or anything! Besides, being joint in the hip would make it very hard for things, if u know what i mean... ahahaha, crapping.

So. The page of my diary.

Written last year. I hope u can read it.

Totally forgot about it till i wanted to look for something today in there. I love my 8 year old sister!!!!!!! She's the sweetest!!! And sooo cute! I must treat her better!!!

I hope we'll still be as close when she grows up!!! Some friendships are way too short-lived. I hope this one'll last! She's my sister!

U seeeeeeeeee, my conteng paper on my study table.... she wrote "I Love u Sister"!!!! =) =)

Makes me melt mannnnnn.

The last person who did similar things... was a very very close friend K. She n i carpooled, and i always had a problem waking up. So whenever she gets to my house early she'd have to wait. She was so sweet and patient with me!

I thought she'd be mad but guess what i found on my scientific calculator?? "Sue Lin is the Best"!!!! Repeatedly!!!! It is some program she made that repeats it!

U see!!! Sooo nice right??? Thank GOD, I took a picture of it before i sold the calculator!!!!

Sad this friendship ended too. We were once so close. We are now so different!

My sister and i would be close when she grows up right???? Oh my god, i wanna cry! I'm going off to Australia next year and i can't bear leaeving my sis behind!!!!!!!!!

Da 1st Time

I'm simply estatic because i've finally
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(i know it's not my style to keep people in suspense this way but i'm a bit influenced by M =)
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(this post includes my boyfriend, my father and a dark blue Wira)
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(sorry... i'm over doing it! Hahaha... so... i'm happy i've finally...)
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drove an auto car!!! For the first time ever today!!!

Chose to buy a manual little Kancil cuz it's about RM10,000 cheaper than the auto one. Plus it's fuel efficient. I'm such a good daughter. =P

And i just love it when people go "Waaaaaah, u drive manual??!?!?". Sounds like "Waaaaah, u won an Oscar" to me! Ahahaha.

So, about a year ago i drove A's auto Kembara and apparently i scared the shit out of him and C. Sorry la, i had no idea how auto works, kinda da opposite from manual, i'm sure u know. And to tell u da truth i was pressing da break instead of the gas... that's why it didn't move... guess i shouldn't have screamed though... Hahaha.

Anyway, back then they were close E and i, so E heard what a terrible auto car driver i was. So he never ever let me drive his car. Ever. =( Doesn't help that my accidents-history isn't good...

Somehow he let me drive today!!!!!!!!!!! =) I was soooooo soooooo happy!!!! =) We've been together for 1 year and...................... almost 8 months and that was da 1st time!

I've waited patiently and it paid off!!!! =) After he let me drive... i went home and my father wanted to take me out, i asked my father to let me drive the auto Wira and he said no at first.

His reason: u have never driven an auto car before. "I drove E's car before!!!" i protested and he let me drive!!!

Yahoooooooooo!!! Drove so much today. So happy. Used to act modest la, when people compliment me on being able to drive manual, i normally say "But i can't drive auto".

And they'd think i'm a weirdo! Now i'm weirdo no more! Yeah! Hahaha


#Note: I wrote this before the other 3 posts. I'm only posting it last.

The End

Sigh, yes, i was the pathetic one.

But on second thought, I don't want to have anything to do with them anymore. I smsed him and he denied everything. It is possible that the person who told me one thing told him a different story. Someone is lying somewhere, and he does not convince me.

I told him i am willing to put everything behind me but i guess i've changed my mind... I don't mind forgiving, but only if he admits he is partly wrong. He is not doing that.

Does it matter? It's not like we're gonna magically be friends again like we were 6 months ago? This is over. Let him think he is the one who broke all ties with me. It's not like he's gonna start talking to me tomorrow anyway.

He is gonna continue avoiding us, isn't he? So save my sms credit.

I mean if he doesn't feel/show any guilt now or anywhere in the past 6 months, why would he feel any remorse tomorrow?

In a situation like, how can the fault be placed on one person and one person alone? Obviously there is a miscommunication somewhere. And lies too. And the whole situation thing and too many people were involved. You are partly to blame, u know?

But it doesn't matter anymore. Even if they forgive me i can't forgive them.

No more, i was so stupid to be willing to accept all the blame if u guys showed me u forgive me anywhere in the past 6 months. Especially in the past 6 weeks when we are all studying in Sunway! You avoided our old hang out place, there's no denying that.

Time's up.

She is nice to me only when she has no choice (aka when she walks past me, yes it is genuine-added 00.50 13 April 06- But) It's not like she approaches me anymore (aka in cafeteria, foyer, smile yes, approach nope-added 00.50 13 April 06-). She's so different now. She used to talk to me a lot, now she doesn't. And in the past she would put little smileys into the messages everywhere too.

She doesn't do that anymore. Throughout summer and now too (i sms her a lot less compared to summer -added 00.50 13 April 06-). I get the impression that she is just replying to be polite. I am giving up la, i don't need u guys to say anything to me anymore.

I'll just accept that it is her choice.

And all the clashes in perception spells the end between us.


Updated 00.00, 13 April 2006: This is MY side of the story. It may be different on theirs, stay neutral please! Do not comment unless u are VERY sure of what u want to say. U do not need to support me, i am fine. Better in fact. It is my decision to give up and i think it is the right one.

To C and A 2

The reason i posted the previous post was because i want to stop hoping that you two would forgive me.
If u wanna confront me, go ahead but you MUST
i) have read every single word in that post.
ii) bring along 3rd parties from Ausmat 2004 to watch.
iii) make an appointment with me 3 days in advance. You must have witnesses to testify.
iv) If there are no willing 3rd parties to listen, your confrontation would not be entertained, u go set up your own blog and clarify anything you want.

And to everyone else, i'm really sorry. It was the first time i ever had conflicts with my friends and i can't handle it. I advise u not to read it because if u do u MUST read every word to get the clearest picture possible. Of course u can tell C n A i of the existance of that post but Please do not gossip about this because if C and A find out, i want them to read it from here and NOT hear it from you. You would surely miss out important things.

If u wanna know more about the situation, aka if u are a busybody, read this. And this http://baybeeteayyy.blogspot.com. Make sure u read every word in every link before u form any judgements/opinions/comment

To C and A

_______This part has nothing to do with the title of the post. ________

Happy there is a new couple around!!! =)

I mean... it's sad to hear my bestfriend is going through boyfriend-girlfriend problems. And the other close friend too, hope what i told him helps. Hope what i told them both helps!

But it just sucks to see so many couples breaking it off. It's like a trend! Since December, was it? So many couples breaking off.

Scares me. When E and i got together, many many couples appeared everywhere. It was like love is in the air. I was really worried when one of the oldest couples split up. If we got together when it was a trend to get together, would we break off when everyone is breaking off??

Doesn't look like we would (break up)... but would u people just stop breaking up left and right???! Hahahaha.

Think of how sad i would be before u break up la. Ahahahaha. I'm crapping. If it's best for u then break up la, dun worry about me k?

Anyway that's why i am really really damn happy 4 the new new couple. Another multi-racial around couple =) Makes me so happy! They give me hope. Unlikely she'd read this but i'd like to congratulate them here! =)

__________________________________________

Oh, and one last thing, whether they read it or i know i posted it. In a way, it is a message to the other multi-racial couple i was so happy for about one year ago... I really want to say it to them but i dun wanna seem stalker-ish and i dun wanna appear like i over-analyze things too much.

But let's face it that is what i have been doing and i desperately want to stop hoping they would forgive me, so.........

I know A blatantly avoids me (at least he still awdwardly waves hello and forces out a smile to me, though...). Looks like he would never forgive me. I must drill that into my head already!!!!

And C and i can never be as close as we used to be.

Anyway, although i really really wish and i did try my very very best, even though i know my best is shit, to mend things between us, it is clear you do not want the same thing.

It is over. I really wish things could become better but i can't go on hoping!!!!! I seriously can't. I have had it. It affects me badly! I started this stupid post as a happy post at 8.30pm and it is 12.30 and i haven't completed it!!! It has been 6months!!!

So, to make sure i stop hoping u would forgive me, i am going to make sure it is the end. By posting this I know i would lose the nice hies and byes. I would kill all possibility of us being close again.

Look at how i sound, did i seriously think we could be close again??? Why have i been kidding myself all this time???

Yes, for the last time i am wrong by calling C names on my blog!!!!! But you could have been the bigger person and forgive me! I apologised repeatedly, i came up to u and admitted my mistake, sorry i was a bit defensive but i meant it!!!! It really was inconsiderate of u two to to make so much noise when the room belongs to 11 people and not just you. And if u didn't realize that after 6 bloody months, would u ever????

Hell i even thanked you for telling me my mistake bacause of this.

It doesn't matter if we would never double date again. After what i am doing in this post, it's all over, you definitely would never forgive me.

Besides you also lied to put emphasis on your point and yet you didn't want to mend things with me!!!?

I started this mess here in this blog, i'm ending it here in this blog.

Just know that i wish u both a lasting, loving relationship. Because it would really suck if u did this to me in her defence and then u guys don't last.

HAPPY EARLY ONE YEAR ANNIVERARY, CAMIRUL.

Catching Up

Had a little Ausmat reunion the other day. Poor E, planned most of the thing and he had 2 fall sick on that day!

Nice seeing those familiar faces and catching up. =)

But it's not like i spoke to all of them. I've never been one who approaches... born shy. Runs in the family, sis n bro r the same. Admit i AM a lot better d, compared 2 primary n kindergarten, secondary also still quite reserved... but still, i AM shy.

Some of u might not think so, but that's cuz u bring out the best in me. =)

Anyway, assignment week's over! Still got one more due Friday but it's group work so i'm more relaxed. Hehe. Most of the remaining assgs are group work! Yahoooo.

Sorry i haven't been reading your blogs! Gonna catch up on that now!


Can't read em all. Too much. Gonna go jog now. I'm almost 56kg!!!! Hellllp, i can't wear shorts anymore, the back of my thighs are unsightly. Dun believe me? I dare u to dare me to post a picture up. But u gotta give me something in return.

And is mother nature trying to stop me from getting rid of my excess weight??? Yesterday rain cats and doggies. Today pulak imitation of the Sahara??!

Do u know where i can buy midnight oil??

Cuz i'm running out...

Gubra

I watched it at the premiere today (Tuesday)!!! Yeah!!!

So nice watching in the same cinema with the stars of the movie and the director herself! =) But i did feel out of place.

To me the movie is... there is... not really a distinct plot and too many sub-plots that stupid me who-can't-recognise-characters-well keep getting confused. It's funny and controversial but a little slow-moving la... feels so long sitting there. I did enjoy it but my stupid assignment was calling me.

Oh yeah, and i cried! Ahahahaha... love the Orked 's parent's scenes in the movie. Damn damn funny. And sooo sooo sweet.

Movie has a few flaws (in my opinion) and i really wish we could stick around long after the movie but had to rush off. Stupid assignments!! Almost missed the little scene after the credits...


You are advised to skip the rest of this post.
# Wrote this part before the first half actually#

Had to develope some photographs. Damn expensive. For 6 stupid 3r photos i paid 5.70. RM3 was for processing fee. Daaamn man. I purposely chose that shop cuz i thought there was no processing fee. And why am i so stupid to ask for 3r?? Damn small. And it costs 45cents a pic. Might as well get 4r la- only 50cents man.

Wasted man. Yeah u say it only adds up to RM5.70. It isnt that big an amoint but i hate myself for not asking for the prices specifically before making a decision to send my pix there. Aiyoh, learnt too much law...

Oh and, i wish i camwhored more. At super busy times like this, i just have to happen to need photos. Would have been great if i had a database of photographs for me to choose from. Since i'm so un-photogenic and i need to take like 15 pix and only one would be good.

One more thing i'm irritated at. Why must Monash University have their holidays one week after Victoria University?? Why?? Why Can't they coordinate with VU to have the same holidays?? Why!?

Idiots. E is in VU and we can't take advantage of low peak rates to go on holiday cuz we don't have the same holidays. Stupid. Have to go on the weekend, which is usually more expensive than weekdays.

And arrrrr, u remember me saying sth about a donut sale for charity?? They're using the profits to bring orphans or something ice skating!!!!! I wanna goooo.... i love ice skating!!! And i love charity i can enjoy.

Other charities i enjoy: donating blood. And buying charity stuff from the club i belong to cuz i get to make friends + make myself look kind! Ahahaha. I'm being honest here, not gonna pretend to be selfless. Also, since i'm almost 56 stupid kg again, i don't wanna eat the charity food i bought so i give them away as gifts to friends. Ahahaha, another good point- make my friends happy. Sooo many birds with one stone.

But because my stupid holidays don't fall the same week as E's, our vacation would be on the exact date as this ice skating charity thing. =( =( =( =(

20th Birthday

Not gonna write much cuz it wasn't as great as last year's.

However, E's presents to me are wonderful. And that will be all i blog about.

Oh and Db and Ad are soo nice 2 surprise me with a cake from Secret Recipe. =) And many thanks for J and M for dedicating a post to me. And the steamboat dinner with W, WS, Db and E was great. But it wasn't really for my b'day la, more like an excuse to eat out... And thanks to those who did wish me...

So E surprised me with this in uni right after my 6pm class!

So beautiful. =) Smelled so good. =)

And i saw this watch i simply loved at first sight.

He bought it for me =) =) New arrival. So me. It's... not kiddish, yet not too grown up and boring. Love the bright bright colours. It's just so me. =) I like strong deep colours. I can't stand pale pastel colours...

Last but not least, the roses again.




That's all about my birthday. Was written yesterday (today is Monday...) but due to stupid connection i couldn't upload the pix. Let me complain a bit now. U can stop reading here.

I warned u. I'm gonna complain about my stupid studies.

Irritating arrrrr my stupid assignments. And i hate my stupid self. Always like that. 4 days last week i intended to do my work. But each time i was tired and opted to get a nap first and then get up and do my work. Ended up sleeping till morning. It's not like i couldn't wake up. I woke up and went back to sleep too many times.

I hate myself!!! =( Yerrrrrr. =( Soooo sooo lazy. I feel like sleeping again!!! (It's 9pm)

U know my little 8 year old sister?? She's top 3 in her class. And she's in the first class man!!! SHiTTTT. Look at me leh? Lazy pig! She did her work in the car, she did her work while other cousins were watching tv. She looked for me to accompany her do her work when my mom went outstation. If i wasn't around she looked for bro. Crazy right???

My bro another genious la. Never study (according to mom) also get 8As for SPM. Only one A less than me* but more A1s than me. Unfair right? He's so lucky to get my mom's brains. They don't have to study yet they do so well.

And my sis inherited both my mother's brain AND my father's hardworkingness. So lucky right??? She's gonna do sooo sooo well.

Me leh, like my father. Need to work hard to do well. BUT i inherited my mother's laziness!!!

Shit laaaaa. Die laaaaaaa. Not smart PLUS lazy. Disaster.


*I was shit hardworking in SPM ok?? 24 hours of tuition a week including English and 3 Physics tuition ok?. And i could go without going online for a week. Also did all the past year papers for maths, add maths and accounting alright??

Why laaaa did i slack off after Ausmat semester 2?? Why why why can't i be like i was??

Stupid Annoying Irritating

I have always hated laptop people at university! Mainly cuz I’m jealous I don’t have one of my own. And cuz they leave stupid wires everywhere for me to trip over.

Right now I’m blogging using my mom’s laptop in uni. And I’m as irritated as ever. To go online I had to register. And I can only use the Monash one 2 or 3 days later. Shit, no one told me that till today!

And the stupid battery had to die. And all the other laptop people beat me to the power points nearby. Man I hate laptop people. Hahahaha.

I clapped and smiled to myself with joy when they left! Man I looked like a retard.

Gotta bring this thing next time.
Or maybe this.

Did I mention what a burden the laptop was? Soooo paranoid that it’d get stolen. My family’s last laptop got stolen at the airport. Irritating.

Gonna do work now… ahh!! =) I can’t believe how happy I am to do my work. Finally!!! After waiting grumpily to charge me battery.

DAAAAAAAMN. Now that it is MY turn to charge. Maintenance just HAD to come by to repair the plug!!! Shitttttt. =(

------Written on 30/3/2006-----


Ahhh.... irritating sooo much work to do that i don't know what to do. All i know how 2 do is sleep. And i stupid gained weight. I'm almost back to my 56kg stupid self that i was in Form5. Shit Shit Shit. And i can't even go jogging now cuz i have too much work to do.

=( Don't wanna do my work. Group work due on Tues. International Biz due on Thurs. Cost Info fot Decision Making due on Fri.... =( Scared. I've never read the textbook. So left behind in AFW2631.

And i wanna blog more!!! =( U can stop reading from here onwards.


Reading this by KM scared the shit out of me. She's motivated... i'm sick to the stomach. I didnt even attend the stupid career fair. Damn. I guess i can still apply for stupid internships online later on... but still... ahhhh. Why must life be so irritating?

Do i have to grow up and start working? The part time job last November killed me- not the job itself but the stupid rush hour traffic...

So life's like that la? U find work that isn't too cruel but something else would kill u la.

I deliberately didnt wana go for the career fair la. I dun wanna be reminded that i'll have to work soon. My senior friend from Summer School told me he went there to apply for jobs. Scary wei.... n i'm not even the one applying. He tell me he apply also i scared already man...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I wanna go to sleep and not wake up. My bed is sooo comfortable and cozy....